Someone sent me a "Job Evaluation Dictionary" the other day... These are "translations" of all those things you see in Performance Evaluations... I thought I'd share some of my favorites:
ACTIVE SOCIALLY: Drinks heavily.
CHARACTER ABOVE REPROACH: Still one step ahead of the law.
QUICK THINKING: Offers plausible excuses for errors.
APPROACHES DIFFICULT PROBLEMS WITH LOGIC: Finds someone else to do the job.
A KEEN ANALYST: Thoroughly confused.
SPENDS EXTRA HOURS ON THE JOB: Miserable home life.
CONSCIENTIOUS AND CAREFUL: Scared.
METICULOUS IN ATTENTION TO DETAIL: A nitpicker.
DEMONSTRATES QUALITIES OF LEADERSHIP: Has a loud voice.
KEEN SENSE OF HUMOR: Knows lots of dirty jokes.
ALERT TO COMPANY DEVELOPMENTS: An office gossip.
ENJOYS JOB: Needs more to do.
HAPPY: Paid too much.
CONSULTS WITH SUPERVISOR OFTEN: Annoying.
WILL GO FAR: Relative of management.
SHOULD GO FAR: Please.
VERY CREATIVE: Finds 22 reasons to do anything except original work.
USES RESOURSES WELL: Delegates everything.
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